Wednesday, March 05, 2008

A Day in the Life 

So as you know, I’m unemployed. In my attempts to focus on the positive aspects of my current situation, I have embraced the unlimited time off. In the beginning, I thought about all of the things I would be able to do now that I don’t have to contend with school and work. One thing I should point out also is that my plan was not to be unemployed for long. Before I had even left teaching, I planned to take a week or two off to get caught up on life, and then be employed by the end of January, doing whatever it was I decided I was going to do. I was going to fly through an endless to-do list that was built over a period of years, enjoy time with my family, spend time with friends, and do that whole “decide what I’m going to do with my life now” thing. As I’m sure most of you are aware, things do not always work out as planned. However, in this situation, things did not go as planned for one reason and one reason only: me. That’s right, I’ve got barely anything accomplished, maybe applied for two jobs and have essentially wasted most of the last five weeks of unemployment. Why, you ask? Because I’m lazy that’s why. Let me tell you a little about my daily routine…..

I get up early. Probably around 6 or 6:30. But only because everybody else is getting up around that time. Having a luxury bedroom built for me in the garage by my father did silence most of the commotion that goes on inside the house, allowing me to sleep through it if needed. The one thing it did not soundproof was the actual opening of the garage door. Dad does that about 6am to get out his bike and ride it to work. If I’m lucky though, he’ll take the car that’s parked outside, sparing me from a very startling alarm clock. So then usually I’ll get up, pee out the previous evening’s liquids, holler at nephews to get out of bed and get ready for school, then saunter back into bed after they and my sister have scrambled out the door. Then I’ll usually watch something that got TIVO’d in the middle of the night, oftentimes Sex and the City, Frasier or Friends depending on what my best friend in a box decided for me. Then on a good day, I’ll get up and take my fat ass for a walk. But more often I’m back to sleep halfway through the chosen sitcom.

The latter part of the morning is spent on the computer. Each day I wake up with the intention of getting stuff done. I’ll check my email first and then maybe some stuff on Dlisted.com. If I feel like having a depressive day, I’ll read the news headlines. Every few days I’ll check my bank balance to see how long I have left to live my Peter Gibbons dream of doing nothing. I’ll glance over a few blogs and maybe see if anything’s going on over on MySpace. I’ll check out Travelzoo to see if there’s any bargains for that vacation I’m gonna book just as soon as I have a job (because this gig I’ve got right now just ain’t a sweet enough vacation for me). Then it’s down to business. Job hunt. Well…sometimes. I keep telling myself I’ll search after just one round of Joboo’s Gems on MSN games. But the problem is that I’ve gotten so good at Joboo’s Gems that one round could last an hour. By the time that’s over with, my eyes are too tired to look at the computer anymore. So I have to take a break and watch some more TV. Did you know that they rerun Boston Public on TVOne? Awesome. I love that show. I probably would have loved it more had I actually stayed a teacher, but we know how that worked out. I was an extra on that show a couple times. Maybe if I’m lucky I’ll see myself on TV. Sweet.

The afternoon I spend my time playing sheriff. My mom gets home from picking up the boys from school, and after a brief play break they are to start their homework. This usually involves some whining and complaining on their part and since she has such a hard time saying no to them, I step up and crack the whip to get them started. That way she preserves her role as sweet and loving grandma, and I protect mine as bitchy Aunt Kristy. I like helping them though. It makes me feel like I’m not such a complete failure as a teacher. Then after their homework is complete, I can sometimes talk them into a round of Go Fish or Old Maid. After dinner they move into their bedrooms to play video games, and I go back to my room to write out all of the things I’m going to get done the next day. Or not get done.

In an attempt to defend my slothful behavior, I have been working my ass off up until these recent events. I’ve spent the majority of my twenties in college, with the latter half doing double duty working full-time and going to school at night. I’m burnt. I’m tired. I wanna screw around. I want to enjoy life and not be so consumed with endlessly pursuing my career. So there.

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